63. Why are personal questions so important?
Many people are deeply involved in things other than their business. They usually have something in their office that is like an open invitation to ask about it. Many sales people avoid talking about these things because they think it is too obvious, however, just the opposite is true. People attach a great deal of importance to the things in their life other than their work. They add to their overall self image and talking about them gives them a great deal of satisfaction.
We find people interesting because of our similiarities not our differences. This method of bonding is very powerful - finding something you have in common with your customer or prospect. Whether you were both in the military, lottery winners or both like playing golf, look for things you have in common and you will become instant friends.
Years ago I was at a mall in Chicago with some time to kill and I saw an encyclopedia booth set up with a display of their books. I didn't want to sit through a sales pitch, however, I did want to know how much it cost on a CD. I approached the sales person and asked for the price. He responded with a question; "What kind of work do you do?" That was all it took. For the next hour we engaged in a conversation about training and if it wasn't for my wife, who came and bailed me out, I might have been the owner of something I had no intention of buying.
How did he get me so involved in talking for an entire hour? He did it by asking personal questions. Questions that I was delighted to answer.
Never hesitate to ask about their family if there is a picture, their golf score if there is a trophy, their hunting adventures, favorite fishing spots, backpacking experience, etc.
What do people like to talk about? Here's a clue. The psychology department at a leading university recently did a test to determine what people do or think. When 500 women were given a fountain pen and asked to write something, 92 percent wrote their own names first. When shown twelve monthly calendars, 470 out of 500 women looked at their own birth date first. When 500 men were shown a map of the country 447 looked first at the location of their home town.
Here are the results of another study done by two professors of psychology in an effort to find out what the average person talks about. They listened in on 500 casual conversations at restaurants, theatre lobbies, stores, barber shops and other places where people meet. They found that people in New York talk about the same things as people in Ohio or California. In 49 percent of the cases men were talking about business, 14 percent about sports, and 13 percent about other men. With women 22 percent of the conversations were about men, 19 percent about clothes, and 15 percent about other women. In general it was found that men talk about things, while women are more interested in talking about people.
Comments:
I called on a potential customer who controlled purchasing for a large company. He was all business and did not want to talk to me about anything else. This went on for a couple of years without him giving me any business. One night at my son’s school basketball game I noticed that he was a referee. I could not wait to go see him the next day. Sure enough, we had our longest meeting so far talking about sports and slowly I began to have success selling to him.
Occasionally I have experienced customers who just want to talk about themselves to anyone who will listen and have no interest in a two way conversation. That is no fun.
Crocker Smith
I totally agree with this lesson. Developing a sincere interest in your customers it’s very important in order to build trusting relationships with them. Believe it or not small details are important in any type of relationships. People remember you for little things that may look insignificant to other people, but impressing for others. Amaze your customers, make them feel that you are not there just to get an order, but because you truly care about them. Without customers, you won't have a business. I believe that getting personal means recognizing each customer's unique needs and responding to them.
Yessie Narvaez
I think asking about things that they are interested in gets them to let there guard down, which in turn leads to what it is you want to talk about. Listen to what it is they are saying and you’ll pick up what it is they need from you.
Brian Spraggins
I think this is very true. Each person we speak with is very different from the next. We need to look at every angle in order for them to become comfortable and want to continue a conversation with us. Some are all business, but others want to talk about something else. I feel that if someone didn’t want to talk about something then they would not have it out in plain view for everyone to see. I have always been taught that if they are displaying it then they want to talk about it. If there is a trophy out, ask about it, odds are they are going to enjoy telling you the story about how they won that trophy. People also like talking about themselves if given the opportunity.
Brandon Sanchez
Personal questions are so important because people like to talk about what they do outside of work. Asking about someone’s personal interest can be their distraction during the normal commotion of hectic business. I personally like to ask about someone’s golf game if they have anything golf related in their office. It seems to be a great door opener.
Matthew Thacker
For me it is so much easier to go to a client or prospect and strike up a conversation about something on a personal level rather than jumping straight to business. It seems to set a more receptive environment too. The person you’re speaking with has a tendency to let their guard down against “the sales person” if you can start the conversation on a personal level.
Lisa Lloyd
I was at a party last weekend and talking to other guys about their business is the best topic of conversation to break the ice. Everybody works so you know that would be a common interest and a passion. Not that my main objective at a party is setting a meeting, but it sets the tone for a relaxed playing field. As is the same when asking what the story is behind that special picture or trophy. It sets the tone for a relaxed atmosphere and a friendly meeting.
Gregg Nixon
Business can be like dating. It’s important you get the “scoop” on prospective clients before you enter a relationship with them, and conversely it is important they learn everything they need to know about you and your business as well.
You will need to ask personal questions and take good notes of the way your client works, what their environment/organizational culture is like, what drives their business and the different types of personalities you’ll be working with so that you can adjust and adapt to best serve their needs.
Marquesa Ortega
This is so true. I was recently closing a deal and while in the Manager’s Office I commented on his décor. He mentioned that his wife had done the decorating and during the conversation I realized that I knew his wife. We talked for an additional 30 minutes and I left feeling much more comfortable than I had before, because now our relationship had become personal. And each time I go to see him I will have something I can talk with him about besides just business.
Kathie Luttrell
"Never hesitate to ask about their family if there is a picture, their golf score if there is a trophy, their hunting adventures, favorite fishing spots, backpacking experience, etc."